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SAS Australia: Cricket great Mitchell Johnson ‘disappointed’ by early exit after depression admission

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Stephanie McKennaThe West Australian
VideoJohnson reveals depression battle on SAS Australia.

Mitchell Johnson has broken down in tears after bowing out of Channel 7’s SAS Australia, revealing a cruel Barmy Army taunt had taken its toll emotionally.

The former Aussie cricket great was the first man to crack under the pressure and withdraw from the competition when his depression — for which he stopped taking medication to go on the show — proved insurmountable.

The Barmy Army, a group of notoriously passionate England cricket fans, were behind an insulting chant that rocked the paceman in the 2010/11 Ashes series.

“I think when you’re playing an elite sport, you have to have that confidence,” Johnson said on SAS Australia.

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“(The 2009 Ashes) didn’t really go to plan. I bowled a bit all over the place. And that’s where the Barmy Army started, ‘Bowls to the left, bowls to the right, Mitchell Johnson your bowling is shite’.

“The media, the Barmy Army really did get to me. I was singing the song in my head when I was playing — so emotionally it had a massive impact on me, and I just sort of fell apart.”

The Barmy Army taunt Mitchell Johnson about his bowling in 2011.
Camera IconThe Barmy Army taunt Mitchell Johnson about his bowling in 2011. Credit: Getty Images

Compared to jumping out of a helicopter head first, carrying a log through a ravine should have been a task Johnson conquered with relative ease in Tuesday night’s episode.

But the challenge proved too much for Johnson who voluntarily withdrew, initially stating he was “embarrassed” by his performance.

“Obviously (I’m) disappointed to be in that situation because I thought I could get through,” Johnson told The West Australian.

“It was one of those things that should have been a strength of mine.”

Johnson among recruits on SAS Australia.
Camera IconJohnson among recruits on SAS Australia. Credit: NIGEL WRIGHT

Johnson was later in tears as he phoned his wife to tell her he was coming home.

“I’m done,” he tearfully admitted.

“I just couldn’t do it.”

Despite rigorous training, it was not enough to prepare the 38-year-old father-of-two for the toll the SAS selection process would take on him psychologically.

“When I was going into the course I didn’t think that I was going to talk about it (mental health), I thought it wasn’t the right platform,” he said.

“I thought ‘why does anyone need to know’, but I guess in the end I was broken down to the point of being able to release that, and it’s made me feel so much better.”

Mitchell Johnson on SAS Australia.
Camera IconMitchell Johnson on SAS Australia. Credit: SAS AUSTRALIA/SAS AUSTRALIA

Chief instructor Ant Middleton admitted he was shocked to see Johnson bow out so early.

“We’re absolutely gutted for you,” he said.

“You know, one of our frontrunners, you probably drained all your mental resources.

“I thought you’d be smashing it, out the front.”

Since opening up on the show about losing his sense of purpose after retiring from cricket in 2015, Johnson felt like a weight had been lifted off him and he has been able to shed some of his tough guy public perception.

“I got a lot out of that conversation,” he said.

“I was able to come out and talk about depression, which is a positive thing.

“I learned a lot about myself where I have this perception of myself, being a certain type of person and it’s actually nice just to blend down the barriers.”

Johnson admitted he was “getting help” again and looking back is “proud” of everything he accomplished.

“There’s no shame in how I’ve gone through this course, it’s bloody tough,” he said.

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